Win Your Child Custody War

Table of Contents

Edited for 2013

Next Edition

This Is The Anything	Dedication	Acknowledgments
Disclaimer	Reviews and Praise	Credentials Vs Credibility

1: War or Peace
Questions and Answers	Pray for Peace - Prepare for War	Intended Audience
Parenting Plan	Where Do You Fit?	Married - Unmarried Parents
Whose Custody Case is this?	Stepmother�s Story	Best Interest
Who Should Not Fight	Reasons People Have Custody	Worst Reasons to Fight
Abuse Excuse	Dead Hand	Children as Pawns
Factors Influencing Decisions	Custody Arrangements	Interim or Temporary Custody
Sole Custody	Joint Custody	Physical and Legal
Joint Physical	Joint Legal	Split Custody
Alternating or Divided	Bird�s Nest Custody	Grandparent Custody
Suddenly Super Parent	Police and Restraining Orders	Life�s Time Line
Short Time Line	Non-Custodial Emotions

2: Issues - Non-Issues
Their Problem or Yours	Child Endangerment	Opposition is a Control Freak
Control and No Responsibility	Blended Family	Mental Illness
Lengthy Child Care	Verbal or Mental Abuse	False Accusations
Frequent Moves	Physical Abuse	Alcohol Use or Abuse
Drug Use or Abuse	They Only Want to Hurt Me	Visitation Interference
Lying to Child, You and Court	Kidnapping	Kidnapping Threat
Domestic Violence	Significant Other - Step-Parent	Alternative Lifestyle
Best Interest of the Child	Neglect	Poor Living Conditions
Responsibility for Problems	Your Expectations	Common Child Custody Myths

3: You Are the Package
State of Mind or Mindlessness	Safety Nets	Group I Need Doesn�t Exist
Why Are You Here?	New Relationships	Invest in Yourself
On the Hot Seat, So What?	Unsolicited Help	The Rescuer
Emotional Vampires	Thanks, But No Thanks	Rest and Relaxation
Aid to the Enemy	Right Thinking	It�s Your Battle Because
Delegation	Personal Security	Bunker (Your Home)
Maneuvers, Planned Action	Retraining	From Now On
No Sniveling or Whining	The Most Important Witness	Dress for Custody Success
What Do I Tell People on My Side?	Confidentiality - Witnesses	I Need a Shrink
Secret Help: Psychologist	When the Police are Called	You Can Get Arrested For
Warrantless Search	Why You Will Be Arrested	If You Are Arrested
Confidentiality - Inventories	Parent as a Soldier	Ask the Real Question
Duck Muck	The One I Feed	A Need To Listen
Proper Responses	Talk, Your Friend Will Listen	Real Victims
Counterfeit Victims	Victim Mentality	Everything is My Fault
Victim or Victor	Internet Security and Privacy	E-Mail Monitoring
Hacking E-Mail	Jail for Reading E-mail	E-mail Security
Computer Monitoring	Your Computer Their Attorney

4: Child's Perspective
Child and Parent Match	Four Types of Attachment	I Want to Stay with You
Children Who Want to Choose	Children Who Can�t Choose	Choice Case
Hearing the Child�s Voice	Stepparents	Significant Others
Non Biological Caretaker Danger	Psychological Parent	Go Where they are Heard
Child�s Realities	Dealing with Child's Fears	What You Can Do To Help
Discipline	Not What I Meant to Say	Styles of Parental Discipline
You Are Always On My Mind	Document Now For Later	Children Stir Things Up
Unhappy Children	Children�s Responsibilities	Info Children Should Know
Walk the Talk	Help Children Be Responsible	Seeing Abuse is Abuse
Buying the Pain Away	Too Much Hurt... Accidentally	Such Behavior is Bad Parenting
Interviewing Children	Confidentiality - Children	Confidentiality - Spouse
Revenge	Letter of Adjustment

5: PAS
Parental Alienation Syndrome	Hostility in Child Custody	What�s Not PAS
PAS Is	Actual Alienating Person	False Accusations
Unconscious Messages	Conscious Messages	Parent is a Chameleon
Combating PAS	Action May Proceed for PAS	PAS Excluded
D.H.S.S. Report on PAS	Healing the PAS Child	Malicious Mother Syndrome
False Accusations	SAID Syndrome	Narcissistic

6: Smoking
For Smokers	Second-Hand Smoke	Is Child Still Exposed
Children�s Surgery	Parental Smoking - Child's IQ	Smoking and Autism
Sperm Trouble for Future	And Mothers	Court�s Reaction
Passive Smoke	Make Them Stop	Cases

7: Religion
Value to the Individual	Children	Separation of Church - State
Christian	Jewish	Intra-Faith Challenges
Cases	Jehovah's Witnesses	Wiccan

8: Breastfeeding
Mother�s Fears	Father�s Fears	Benefits
Pump and Go	Breast Milk Shelf Life	Primary Caretaker

9: Homeschooling
An International Movement	Schedule and Methods	In Custody Cases
Qualified to Homeschool	Pro Homeschooling	Assembling Advocates
Proving a Pro Position	Against Homeschooling	Parent�s Fears
Assembling Advocates	Proving a Con Position	Example of Termination

10: Grandparent or Kinship Care
Heartbreaking Civil War	Guilt In Abundance	Family #1
Family #2	Family #3	Family #4
Family #5	Grandparents on the Front Line	Videotapes
Rights - Responsibilities	Federal Laws	Families as Resource #1
A Long Tradition	Stepparent Adoption	Co-Guardianship
Case #1	Case #2	Appointment of Guardian
Standby Guardianship	Getting Started	Example Form
Cases	Grandparents v Father

11: Job - Custody Connection
Running on Empty	Stability - Reliability	Work From Home
Cost to the Company	Co-Workers	Negative Impact
Supervisors	Enabling Behaviors	The Supervisor Must
The Supervisor Can�t	Violence in the Workplace	2003 Incidents
Crisis Situations	Explain Your Crisis	Confidentiality - Employment
Your Personal Information	Employee Evaluation	Lost Jobs
Jobs Not Taken	Back-Up Plan

12: Strategies
Reality Check	Well, Get Over It	Desire vs Reality
Looking Past 2005	Changes in the Wind	Strategic Interaction
Strategy = Planning	Deliberate, Rational Enemy	Specific Techniques
Live and Let Live	Tit For Tat	Look Ahead
Tester	Tranquilizer	Exploitative Retaliation
Attrition	Deterrence	Reciprocity
Random	Agendas	Your Motives
Changing Strategies	Defensive Behaviors	Remedies for Behaviors
Delay	Strategic Case Boosters	Activities to Cultivate

13: Conflict Resolution
Problems They Cause	Problem Solving	Why They Do That
Pre-Contact Planning	Negotiation	Why Cooperate?
Opposition Will Cooperate?	Reduce Differences	Aim to Negotiate, Not to Win
Overcoming Obstacles	If You Have to Fight	Discover Hidden Agendas
Children�s Agenda	Children Have Agendas	Conflict
Methods of Thinking	Moral Obligation	Changing Strategies
Mediator with Attorneys	Not Really the Same	Using a Professional
Mediators	Court Facilitated	Attorneys
Three Reasons to Negotiate	Right Place - Time to Negotiate	Preparation
Assumptions	Guidelines for Discussion	How to Negotiate

14: Friend or Enemy?
Make Words Work for You	It's Your Army; Censor It	Loose Lips Sink Ships
Security Breach	If You Disregard This Advice	Fear and Communication
Communication Test	Dealing with Fear	News Flash Junkies
Safe Answers	Friendly Fire	People Who Cause Damage
Important to Ponder	Family In-laws and Outlaws	Your Parents
Opposition's Parents	The Agendas of Your Friends	Friendly Strangers
Know Your Enemy	Data Sheet	Noncombatants
Data Sheet Form	Information and Misinformation	Source of Information
Sabotage	6 Year Case Study	Case Killers
List of Activities to Avoid	Hurt You Worse Than Them	Anger and Joy
You�ve Been In Court Too Long

15: Documentation - Evidence
Contact Logs	Reasons for Documentation	Detective
Attorney	Evaluator	Guardian ad Litem
Telephone Log	Methods of Documentation	Telephone Contact Log
Admissible Evidence	Backdooring Evidence	Exclusion of Evidence
Web Sites as Evidence	Off Line Web Sites Live On	Chain of Evidence
Spoliation of Evidence	Spoliation = Judgment?	Take Photos of Everything
Children Love Em�	The Dark Side	Evidence - No One Cares

16: Contact Log
Is It Worth Doing?	Simplicity and Speed	Confidentiality - Documentation
Crucial Data to Record	Codes for Log Book	Contact Log 1991-2004

17: Equipment - Services
Equipment	Cell Phone Video Clips	Recording Phone Calls
Interspousal Wiretap Exception	Invasion of Privacy	Services
Daycare Workers	Parent Locator Service	Testing Services
Lie Detector Test	Paternity Testing	DNA - Genetic Testing
Court Ordered	Gathering DNA Samples	Necessary for DNA Testing
Challenges to DNA Testing	Negative Test - Still Father	Paternity May Be Settled
Contesting Paternity	Can't Sue Wife for Lying	Computer Data Retrieval

18: Drugs - Alcohol
Drug Tests	Urine Analysis	Passive Inhalation
Hair Analysis	Will You Take a Drug Test	Factor 1000 Impairment Test
Alcohol - Drug Tests	Random Testing	Court Room Samples
Hair Analysis	Urine Analysis	False Positives
Passive Inhalation	Club Drugs	Prescription Drug Abuse

19: Pro Se
Representing Yourself	First Things First	No Pro Se Recovery of Fees
What Law School Teaches	Getting Started Pro SE	Hang Around the Court
Court Preparation	In Court	Precedent
Forced to be Pro Se	Not Held Same As Attorney	No Recovery of Fees

20: Attorney
Right to Free Counsel	Scumbag�s Attorney	Legal Aid
Navy Legal Assistance	Shared Attorney	How to Find an Attorney
Initial Consultation	Won�t Take Your Case	Good Old Attorney System
More Bang for the Buck	Secret Weapon	Don't Hire Attorneys Who
Sorting Out the Bad Apples	Before 10: AM After 5: PM	Bad Rap Attorneys Get
Confidentiality - Attorney	Cannot Do	Can Do
Keep a Good Attorney Happy	Military Attorney	Soldier-Mom AWOL
Case Analysis	Communicate with Attorney	Advised Non-Compliance
Restraining Order	Dealing with a RO	Police Liability?
Personal Protection Order	Communicating with Enemy	Communicate with Attorney
Sex and Your Attorney	Before You Assign	Win Their Attorney Over
Get Rid of Their Attorney	Disqualifying Their Attorney	Attorney Invoice
Attorney and the Liar	Accessory to Your Crime	Attorney Can Fire You
My Way or the Highway	Please Release Me, Let Me Go	Indifferent or Incompetent
Reasons to Fire Attorney	Fire a Bad Attorney	Getting Your Documentation
New Attorney = Delay	Lawsuits Against Attorneys	Suing Your Attorney

21: Detectives
Covert Intelligence Division	Can Do	Right One for You
Interview the Detective	Understanding the Costs	Avoid Hot Shots
A Snake Is A Snake Is...	Keep A Good Detective Happy	Help Your Detective
Stay Alert	Opposition�s Detective	Report Examples
Are You Are Being Watched	Getting the Evidence	Surveillance Terms
Assignment Example #1	Assignment Example #2	Assignment Example #3
Discovery Bonus In Report	Assignment Example #4	Assignment Example #5
Assignment Example #6	Assignment Example #7	Assignment Example #8
Confidentiality - Detective	Sex and Your Detective	Detective to Outlaw

22: Evaluations
Purpose for an Evaluation	Types of Evaluations	Who and Why?
Attitude with the Evaluator	Facing the Other Parent	When There are Two of You
How Important Are They?	Negative Information	How Do I Prove...
Positive Information	What are They Observing	Confidentiality - Evaluator
If You Gotta Go	Make it Easier for Children	Evaluator's Report #1
Evaluator's Report #2	Evaluator's Report #3	Evaluator's Report #4
Evaluator�s Report #5	Evaluator�s Report #6	Home Study
What Costs are Involved?	Prepare for the Home Study	Book/ Video of Your Life
Letters of Support	Letters of Love	Letter to Document Violation
Help from Hell	What are they Looking for?	Evaluating the Evaluation
Data to Identify Concerns	Frequent Moving	Home Study Report #1
Compare Apples to Oranges	Condition of Child #1	Condition of Child #2
Home Study Report #2	Home Study Report #3	Eliminate the Trash
Flaws in the Process	Second Home Study	Evaluating the Study
Filing a Formal Complaint

23: Experts
Qualifications	Costs Involved	What Can Experts Do?
Some are Prostitutes	Hiring Your Expert	Confidentiality - Expert
Your Expert In Court	Peer Review	Attacking Qualifications
Opposition�s Expert	Loose Cannon	Depose Opposition's Expert
Opponent's Expert in Court	Stricter Standards for Experts	Tainted Expert Witness

24: Psychologists - Tests
War of the Minds	Who Can Perform Tests?	Types of Psychologists
Check Out the Psychologist	Psychologist Contact Log	Attitude with the Psychologist
Before the Appointment	Facing the Other Parent	Recommendation = Decision
When There are Two of You	What are they Looking for?	Positive Character Traits
Send Up Warning Flags Early	The Process of Evaluation	10 Tests for Adults
Confidentiality - Psychologist	Sex and the Psychologist	Filing a Formal Complaint
Change Where the Children Live?	11 Tests for Children	Challenge Evaluations
Psych. Evaluation #1	Psych. Evaluation #2	Evaluating the Psychologist #1
Handle a Bad Evaluation	Filing a Formal Complaint	Evaluating the Psychologist #2

25: Visitation
Types of Visitation	Is a Right of the Child	Grandparent Visitation
Exercising Visitation	Successful Visitation	Your Interference with Your Visit
Passports and Travel Visas	Fear of Flying	Children with Disabilities
My Child Hates Visitation	The Only Right Message	Custodial Responsibilities
Override of Right to Travel	Non-Custodial Responsibilities	I Don�t Want to Visit You
Whim or Survival	A Phone Call Away	Parental Interference
Prove Denial of Visitation	Proving A Denial	Tort - Interference
Visitation Interference	Interference Money	Visitation Bond

26: Move Away
No Move Away Provision	Best Interest Move Away	Limited Presumption
Presumption for Move Away	Order Requiring Notice	Proposed Relocation
Nondisclosure of Relocation	Failure To Give Notice	Failure to Obey
Objection to Relocation	Order For/Against Relocation	Relocation Package
Mother Allowed to Move	Mother Cannot Move	CA Move-Away Cases

27: Lies and Perjury
Types of Lies	Types of Liars	Why do they Lie?
Best Reasons Not to Lie	Conflicting Truths	Memory�s Imperfections
Exaggerations - Fabrications	Portrait of the Liar	Who are Better Liars?
When is Someone Lying	Lies by Strangers	Lies by Familiars
Professional Lie Detectors	Seeing the Pattern of the Liar	Why Liars Get Caught
Liars Even Lie to Themselves	Recruiting Troops	Defense Against Lies
The Grand Lie	Handling the Liar	Lie Suppression
Sue the Liar	Use Their Lies Against Them	Proof or Poof
Impeachment of a Witness	Children and the Liar	When Children Lie
Where Do You Fit?	Non-Fatal Flaw	Your Lies
Cold Turkey Truth	Start Repairing the Damage	Admission of Wrongdoing
Can't Pay Witness to Not Testify	Correcting Old Lies	Identifying the Liar to Others
Telling the Awful Truth	Perjury in Family Court!	Attorneys and Lies
Court Calls a Liar a Liar	No Lie Double Talk

28: Panic Situations
Pro Active Steps	Threat Analysis	Threat Analysis Questions
Personal Safety Plan	Learn from the Pain of Others	Panic Situations, Examples
# 01 Legal Papers	# 02 Misuse of Money	# 03 Parent Moved Child
# 04 Job/Phone Harassment	# 05 Bruises on Child	# 06 Implied Threats
# 07 Accusation of Abuse	# 08 Abandonment	# 09 Restrict Child�s Calls
# 10 Child Not Available	# 11 Public Display of Affection	# 12 Stops Child�s Mail
# 13 Removed from Benefits	# 14 No Holiday Visitation	# 15 Calls Upset the Child
# 16 Child In Danger 331	# 17 Exchange Changed	# 18 Other Parent Has Cancer
# 19 Restrict Time with Child	# 20 Bad-mouthing You	# 21 Working Things Out
# 22 Denial of Contact	# 23 Other Parent Costing $$	# 24 Parental Alienation
# 25 Demand for Information	# 26 Disneyland Parent 334	# 27 Grandparent Visitation
# 28 Secret Court Documents	# 29 Different Parenting Style	# 30 Conflict at Exchange
# 31 Misuse of Evaluation	# 32 Ex Parte Hearing - Order	# 33 Child Pressuring Parent
# 34 No Money, No Attorney	# 35 Other Lawyer Costing $	# 36 Grandparents� Custody
# 37 Child�s Preference	# 38 Teenager, No Visitation	# 39 Attorney Wants to Quit
# 40 We Comply, They Don�t	# 41 Accused of Sexual Abuse	# 42 Visit Home Is Dangerous
# 43 Opposition Won�t Pay	# 44 Lied, Forged, Ignore Court	# 45 Parent Threatens Suicide
# 46 Religious Grounds	# 47 Lawyer Screwed Me	# 48 No Insurance Card
# 49 Volunteer Spy	# 50 Judge�s Friend	# 51 Internet Lurking
# 52 Prosecution for Perjury	# 53 Public Harassment	# 54 Change of Circumstances
# 55 Lesbian Mom	# 56 Ex Excluded as Guardian	# 57 Credit Report, No Permission
# 58 Bio-Dad v Adoptive	# 59 Step-Mom Wants Custody	# 60 Computer Evidence
# 61 Ex Won�t Complete Move	# 62 Military Non-Support	# 63 Unfit Parent
# 64 Grandparent Interference	# 65 Searched My House	# 66 Confidentiality of Case
# 67 Fined for Legal Advice	# 68 Grinding Me Down	# 69 Leaving, Owes Support
# 70 Spouse Tips Police	# 71 Bipolar Disorder	# 72 Child�s Right to Choose
# 73 Back to Court	# 74 Child�s Medial Ignored	# 75 Dangerous Teen
# 76 I Need Partial Custody	# 77 Trashed By The Expert	# 78 Kid�s Positive Drug Test
# 79 In Jail, Terminate Rights	# 80 Absent Dad Returns	# 81 Drunks Driving Child
# 82 Money Peaks Interest	# 83 Idealizing Absent Parent	# 84 Adult Abused as Child
# 85 Stepmom as Mom	# 86 Info on New Mom	# 87 Custodial Parent Died
# 88 Child Support Harassment	Evaluating Your Situation	Your Panic Situation List
Dealing With Your Anger	The Anger of Others	Anger in Our Children

29: Suicide - Murder
Violence Warning Signs	A Father�s Suicide Note	Statistics and Results
Murder and Custody	Possible Murder-Suicide	Kills Children and Suicides
Suicide After Jail Time	Courthouse Suicide	Suicide to Manipulate Others
The Truth About Suicide	Handling the Angry Person	Feeling Suicidal
What to Tell Children	Children�s Feelings About Loss	The Famous Aren�t Immune

30: Neglect - Abuse - Violence
Categories of Neglect and Abuse	Indications - Negligence or Abuse	Child�s Reactions to Abuse
Penalty for Reporting Abuse	Child Protective Services	When CPS Gets A Call
Grounds to Continue Investigation	Court Ordered Cooperation	CPS Knocks at Your Door
Order a Copy of the Policy Manual	Get Records from the Agency	Removal of the Children
If Your Child Is Removed	Motivation of Reporters	Abuser�s Reaction
Arrest for Abuse	Explanations of Abuse Terms	Getting Child Back from CPS
Has Child Been Abused?	Anatomical Detailed Dolls	Munchausen by Proxy

31: Allegations
Accusation of Abuse	Preventing False Accusations	Deal with False Accusations
False Accusations Examined	Profile for False Accuser	Post Accusation Behavior
Children - False Accusations	Requesting Supervised Visit	Complying with Supervision
Supervised Visitation Options	Disproving False Accusations	First Hand Story
Sue for False Accusations

32: Supervised Visitation
Types of Supervision	How Supervision Helps	Attaining a Court Order
Cost	Preparing Your Child	Order Example
Reporting to the Court	Requesting Supervision	For the Other Parent
Your Supervised Visitation	Child in Danger	Violence Assessment
Police	Violent Patterns Won�t Change	When Will It End
Abuse Behaviors at Visitation	Custodial Parent Stress

33: Kidnapping
Abduction-Resistant Child	Kidnapping	Prevention
Profile of the Abductor	Kidnapping Warning Signals	Has Child Been Kidnapped?
Emotions During Kidnapping	Kidnapping	Damages Awarded
Kidnap Friendly Countries	International Abduction	Retrieval Questionnaire
Legal Steps for Recovery	Family Tree	The Paper Trail
Places to Look	Money	If You are Forced to Leave
Emergency Jurisdiction Ends	Laws Can�t Hide Child	Parents Jailed

34: Discovery/Deposition
Feast or Famine	Surprise and Ambush	I Have to Tell Them What?
And If I Won�t?	Fruit of the Poisonous Tree	Interrogatory
Objecting in Interrogatory	Production and Inspection	Documents and Records
Produced by Mistake	Tape-recorded Conversations	Confidentiality - Documentation
Photographs and Video Tapes	Medical Records	First Strike
Deposition	Explanation of a Deposition	Four Reasons to Depose
Objection to Discovery	Costs for Deposition	Best Time to Depose
Second Deposition	Prepare for a Deposition	Your Deposition
Psychological - Emotional Prep	Attorney Preparation	Information is not Protected
Deposition Instructions	During Your Deposition	Facing the Mad Dog Attorney
Check Your Deposition	Ending the Deposition	Correcting Deposition
Video Deposition or Court	False Documentation	Who Would You Depose?
Opposition�s Deposition	Check the Deposition	Check Expert's Deposition
Witnesses� Deposition	Deposition Summary	Deposition Indexing
Disprove Statements	Failure to Comply

35: Judges
Hierarchy in Law	Two Levels of Law	Welcome to the Hotel California
Jurisdiction Shopping	Getting a Good Judge	Like No Other Law
Research Your Judge	Those Who Render Opinions	Which Judge is Mine?
Even a Blind Judge will See	Who Do You Think You Are?	Judge Should Be Removed
Judges Can Step Down	Grounds for Removal	Three Types of Removal
Motion May Fail or Backfire	Example: Motion for Recusal	Affidavit, Support of Motion
Recusal Cases	Venue to Eliminate Bad Judge	Venue Case
Whose Custody Case is this?	How Judges Decide	Judicial Power, Can Do
What Judges Cannot Do	You Can�t Do with the Judge	Your Expectations
A Matter of Perception	Judicial Immunity	Abuse of Discretion
Filing a Formal Complaint	Judge in Hot Water	Confidentiality - Judge
Judge�s Ruling on Motion	Judge or Jury	Judges are not Immune

36: Child�s Testimony
Child�s Own Attorney	Demystifying the GAL	When the GAL Becomes Involved
Investigating Issues	Factors Considered	After the Investigation
Replace the GAL	Alternatives to Open Court	Ten Tips to Help Children
Confidentiality - Children	Children Feel Guilt	Child�s Need to Know
Why Children Don�t Lie Well	Don�t Tell Children to Lie	Who Knows the Child Lied?
Children Testifying in Court	Competence to Testify	Knowing Truth from Lie
Challenging Testimony	Fear, Bias, Prejudice	Suppress Testimony
Content of Testimony	Ryan Factors	Anger Against You
Disallowing Testimony

37: Court
Bias	Time Line	The Ultimate Battlefield
Types of Courts	Types of Cases	All Court Appearances Equal?
Pre-trial Conference	How Subpoenas Work	I Won�t Respond
Elements of Contempt	Defenses to Contempt	Prima Facie Evidence of Contempt
Court Before Court	Your Case Strategy	Court Presentation Outline
Non-Issue	Your Assignment	Refreshed Memory
Last Review	Court Room Tips	What Is a Witness?
Witness Preparation	Confidentiality - Witnesses	Contempt of Court
Documenting Contempt	Filing a Contempt Motion	Defending Contempt Charges
Speak to Inequity	Visual Impact/Court	Clothes Make the Witness
Major Problem Areas	Eye of the Beholder	In Court
Witnesses� Demeanor	Attitude	What a Witness Cannot
Witness Guide for Questions	Dodging Enemy Fire	Their Bullet Your Target
Types of Questions	Types of Questioning	Direct Examination
Cross Examination	Re-Direct	Not Sure! Not Sure?
Frontal Assault	All on Same Side?	Who will Attend the Trial?
Your Day In Court	TOC  Testimony	It Ain't Over When It's Over
Appeal the Threat	The Appeal Process	Should You Worry?
Confidentiality - Court	Vexatious Litigation	Civil Appeal Example
Modification	Court Corruption

38: Costs
No One Cares	When is War Chest Spent	Cutting Costs
1. Negotiation	2. Fast Tracking	3. Rent-A-Judge
Bankruptcy	Bill Collectors	Acknowledge Paternity
Are You Poor Enough?	According to the Court	According to the IRS
Dependent Credits	Hidden Assets	Tax Gifts and Insurance
Earned Income Credit	Use a Good Tax Advisor	Termination/Non-Compliance
Termination of Rights	Termination and Adoption	Voluntary Relinquishment
Termination - Adoption Stepchild	Social Study Report	Decree of Termination / Involuntary Relinquishment

39: Child Support
Verification of Income	Self Employment	Lottery Winnings
Hidden Sources of Income	Income Not On Tax Forms	Child Support Theory
Ability to Pay	Ability to Earn	Costs to Rear a Child
Child Support Starts	Child Support Ends When	Appropriate Support?
Too Much or Too Little?	Imputed Income	Below the Guidelines
Guideline Departures	Temporary Modification	No See - No Pay
Can�t See No-pay	Can�t Pay	Advised Not to Pay
Who, When, How, Where	No Place to Send Payment	No Court Order
Appeal Doesn�t Stop Support	Best Attitude for Paying Support	Remove the Sting of Paying
Support as a Expense/Debit	Security for Support Awards	Out-of-Pocket Medical Expenses
Support and Bankruptcy	Best Attitude for Receiving	Support Not Spent on Children
Best/Worst States for Collection	Child Support Doesn�t Come	Collection Methods
Where Child Support is Spent	International Enforcement	Statute of Limitations
Criminal Non-support	Under the Table Employment	Assistance with Back Support
Waiting Too Long to Collect	Military Service and Support	Proceed Without Deployed Dad
Child Support Court Cases	Support for Kidnapped Child	Concealed Child
Hide the Child, Hide the Money	Age, Not Activity	Religious Objection to Support
Reduced for Time with Child	Reduced by Benefits	Father's Debt Service
Forced to Provide College	Hardship Deduction Reversed	Case: License Revocation
Passport Restrictions	Lottery Payments Frozen	One Dad�s Story

40: End or Beginning
Forgiveness	When You Win Custody	Is This the Win I Wanted?
Mental House Cleaning	The Hard Part	To Build a Healthy Child
And the Beat Goes On	When You Lose Custody	Emotions and Feelings
Many Emotions - Most Hurt	Now is not Forever	Make the Not-So-Good Better
Let Go	Normal Feelings	Usual Challenges
Helpful Applications	Safe Answers	Concentrate on the Children
New Traditions	Holidays	Major Holidays
After You're Gone	Seek Support	Start a Support Group
ANYWAY	New Relationships	Red Flags

41: Miscellaneous Cases
Use of Case Cites	Tender Years Doctrine	Real Advantage Test
Shared Parenting	Doubtfire Clause or First Right	Constitutional Right
Fair Law - Unfair Enforcement	Fifth Amendment	Can't Choose Modification
Right to Raise Children	Change of Circumstance	Expunged Records
Lesbian and Gay Parents	Glossary of Terms	Index

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