Customer Reviews for Editions 1994 thru 2004

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Wake up call, April 15, 2005
 

Reviewer:

Amazonbombshell (Milwaukie, OR, USA)

DEAR JUDGE broke my heart many times. I have never been through a divorce or on any side of a custody battle, but I have seen the long- and short-term effects on friends at school (from elementary up through college), children I work with, and on my own husband, who went through a very messy divorce and custody battle between his parents, beginning at age 12.

Reading these plainly presented letters to a family court judge from children of all ages, I found myself beginning to understand what it must be like to be so powerless and so scared. The letters come from children in situations ranging from not-quite-right-anymore to terrifying and abusive, but the reader gets the sense that all of these children have been wronged in the same way: their true selves have been ignored.

Adults forget what it is like to be a child, and we also forget that children notice and absorb nearly EVERYTHING we say and do. These letters prove how much kids really know, and how much they can teach their parents and caretakers, the justice system, and society in general. All parents should read this book, most particularly those who have divorced a spouse with whom they had children. And older kids might benefit from these letters, too. They might be helped by reading what other kids have gone through, and knowing that they are not alone.

The book's format is very simple: two pages of introduction telling why it was written, followed by over a hundred letters to the judge. I thought initially that it might benefit from some in-depth discussion and concrete suggestions for adults, but perhaps that is best left to therapists and the deeper books they write. These letters, unadorned, are incredibly powerful, and if you have ever loved a child, they will touch your heart and change the way you think about kids.
 

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Touching, Sad, Distressing & Important, April 14, 2005
 

Reviewer:

Adam Sacks (Calabasas, CA United States)

This book is touching and sad but also very important to read. Parents doing through divorces are hurting their children for the long term in so many ways. Listen to their voices in this book, it's sad and touching. Divorce doesn't have to be this bad.
 

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Required reading for parents, judges, attorneys, September 28, 2004
 

Reviewer:

Harold McFarland (Florida) TOP 50 REVIEWER

Filled with short letters from children to the judge, "Dear Judge" will at times make you laugh and at times make you believe in the family court system, but mostly it will point out the ways the court system and parents fail to take a child into consideration. When a young child has a question they generally turn to their parents, but when the parents say they can't take them somewhere, or see them more often, or otherwise satisfy the needs of the child because the court system constrains them they have to take other measures. These children took their pleas to the judge. Encouraging, disheartening, and enlightening, "Dear Judge" should be read by judges, parents, and attorneys alike.
 

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From the minds and mouths of the innocent, September 11, 2003
 

Reviewer:

Jeanne S, Krause (Thousand Palms, CA United States)

Charlotte Hardwick has done a real service to families by sharing these delightful letters from innocent children who find themselves caught up in custody cases. If only parents could read them BEFORE going to court.

I laughed; I cried; and I learned from the viewpoint of the most innocent victims in custody cases--the children. "Dear Judge" has earned a permanent place in my personal library.
 

Ouch! I didn't know children saw so much., May 12, 2003
Reviewer: A reader
Great piece of work. I can see their faces and feel their hearts in these letters. I wanted more and could not have handled more at the same time. Buy this one and then try to keep your friends from walking off with it.
 

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Fear, anger, confusion, love, grief and hope, January 12, 2003 (1st edition review)
 

Reviewer:

Joanna Daneman (Middletown, DE USA) TOP 10 REVIEWER

This is a slim volume of actual letters written by children to the judge in divorce/custody suits. It is a sad little commentary in the real voices of those who are most hurt by marriage break-ups.

As a guide to parents facing separation, divorce, shared or sole custody, or blended families, it is probably invaluable, as well as being a very touching book to read. For anyone not in those situations, whether judge, lawyer, caseworker or even just a member of society watching families dissolve, this is a education about the feelings of the most vulnerable members of our society--children.

My favorite letter (among so many good ones):

Dear Judge,

....Grandpa said that just because my parents are big that doesn't mean they are grown up.

He promised as soon as they are grown up they will take care of me again. Grandma said he is telling me the truth.

Your friend,
TD

And there are more letters equally meaningful. You don't want to miss this book if you are facing family problems.

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Kids say the darndest things, September 21, 2004 (2nd edition Review)
Reviewer: Joanna Daneman (Middletown, DE USA) TOP 10 REVIEWER

Kids write to judges about custody battles, divorce and other family matters. The letters are real, compiled by Charlotte Hardwick. The author says the letters deal with "fear, anger, confusion, love, grief and hope." One child writes

"My stepdad explained the Justis Sistem (sic) to me. It does not sound right."

The letters are short and pithy, or longer and amazingly eloquent.

If any of these emotions are striking into the heart of your family during a custody crisis or other family court matter, this book is heartening reading. Pale Horse Publishing specializes in books on family court matters.

 

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I thought these letters were out there, somewhere!, October 16, 2001
 

Reviewer:

"katclarkson" (Mission Viejo, CA)

Sometimes it takes weeks and months to build enough trust with a child to get this kind of honestly felt comment. I had a notion these letters were out there.

I have purchased Dear Judge in bulk and am handing it out to parents the court has assigned to me for family evaluation.

I will put my personal favorite here...

Dear Judge,

Please have the valuator come back out to our house. The day she came was not a day like all the rest. The kitchen caught fire because my brother was trying to make cheese grill sandwiches for us kids to eat so mom could talk to the valuator. Tell Miss Hill the dog never peed on anyone before and we will put him outside this time.

Yours truly, Bobby J.
 

This company deserves a 'Thank You' for taking the time to present these letters in Dear Judge,.